I shouldn't be wishing such stuff on others, but sometimes I'm glad she's here because I know I'm not in it alone, I'm not the only one feeling this way. Even the fact that someone else cant see it the way we do.. she makes it so much better.
She's right you know. We can't run away, but we know there are more important things to focus on.
At least we have our priorities right.
Now that I look back on my posts I regret saying those mean things because deep down I love someone like a sister and I know she has a good heart despite being frivolous and all. She's a great person because she genuinely is good-natured, she cares for the people around her accordingly.
I dont dare to beg forgiveness for saying such stuff about you. It was wrong of me to do that and I know it but I can't really take it back after you've read it.
But J, I hope you know I love you, I would never do anything to deliberately hurt you for no reason, and I'm sorry for pangsehing you. I just wish you'd tell me what you were feeling because I didn't know you were unhappy. I sensed it, yes. But I didn't know what was the cause of it. I tried asking but you didnt respond. I didn't know what else to do.
I beg of you. PLEASE tell me if you're unhappy. Because sweeping it under the carpet will only make it more awkward. We both know things arent the same, yet we try to act like everything's normal. But it isn't, and the tension is just getting worse.
Sometimes I wonder how long you've been reading my private posts, it shouldnt be but it is a comfort to know that you cared enough to want to know what I was thinking.
But at the end of it I'm not going to force you into doing stuff you dont want to.
If this is what you want, then I'll go along with it.